Time away

 For the first few months of this journey, I was on task for every aspect of this course.  Then life started to get in the way.  I took on some extra responsibilities with work and at home and I used my free time doing other things.   Excuses, all.  And now I am behind by fully two months.  I have two years to finish this program, though I suppose I could always start over because the important part is the learning, not so much the certification.  As I have fallen further and further behind, I have felt more and more guilt about being behind and less and less confident about what I have already learned and my ability to continue to learn.  Vicious cycle.

I have a lot of projects that don't get finished.  It is not uncommon for me to get 90% complete and then walk away.  I take on new stuff all of the time and then fall off of the passion when it gets to be too much.  Perfectionism, insecurity, something I don't know yet, all could be reasons.  It is frustrating, that much I know.  I didn't want this course to be another one of those things.  I am writing this blog post to commit to myself, to acknowledge this path is important and valuable to me and I am worthy of continuing on this journey.

The thing I have been doing, besides studying, is using what I have been learning.  And that actually, means a great deal to me.  As I write this, I have Covid.  I am a few days past diagnosis and starting to feel a bit more like myself.  I have to stay home this week and isolate, so I hoped to get back to studying.  But I felt I needed to acknowledge the gap because it holds some fear and apprehension.    I have been using herbal remedies for a few years, not a lifetime.  I have encountered some internal resistance to the shift from Western medicine and culture.  For example, I suffer from chronic pain and trusting something other than ibuprofen has been a big shift for me.  Sometimes, herbal remedies do the trick and sometimes, they haven't.  I am not willing to say they don't, but perhaps I haven't found the right one for me. I have also been reflecting on the components of my chronic pain that are emotional in nature.  I have only just begun this journey and it has been a component of why I am two months behind in my studies.  I have had a bit of mental and emotional overload.

Getting Covid and using herbal remedies has been a good experience.  I don't get sick often.  In fact, the last time I was sick was also with Covid, but in 2021 I think.  I have been using commercially available herbal concoctions that I have on hand.  While I have made a number of things, I am not quite confident that I am able to use them adequately. This time around, I have been taking two products that I believe are helping me recover.  One is from Herb Pharm called Rapid Immune Boost.  It contains Echinacea root, Goldenseal rhizome and rootlet, Elecampane root, Splilanthes whole flowering plant, Yerba Santa aerial parts, Horseradish root, Ginger rhizome, Black Elderberry fruit, Yarrow flowering top and Wild Indigo root.  I will research each of these herbs today and add them to my Materia Medica.  I have researched some of them already, but a review will be good to do.  The other product is Bronchial Wellness tea from Gaia.  It contains Peppermint leaf, Licorice root, Grindelia aerial parts, English Plantain leaf, Star Anise fruit, Thyme aerial parts, Helichrysum aerial parts, Eucalyptus leaf essential oil, Peppermint aerial parts essential oil.

I am still forming a lot of mucus and coughing hard, especially at night.  I have a flash card from my first lesson on Anticatarrhals, which are herbs that can help reduce mucus.  They include Baptisia, Boneset, Cayenne, Coltsfoot, Elder, Elecampane, Garlic, Ginger, Goldenrod, Hyssop, Sage, Echinacea, Goldenseal, Marshmallow, Mullein, Thyme and Yarrow.  Looks like there is some good crossover with what I have been using and what is recommended.  I do have a mushroom product that I may add to my protocol.  It is called Breathe from Host Defense.  It is made from Chaga, Reishi and Cordyceps.  Now may not be the time as these mushrooms are best for healthy individuals.  Maybe in a week or so, I will add them to help heal any lingering damage to my respiratory system.  I tend to forget to do restorative herbs.

This has been encouraging for me.  I felt called to write a bit, examine my apprehension, see what is true and what might not be.  I may not be quite ready to create my own formulas, but I am ready to trust what I am learning and to put it to good use.

Now please excuse me, I need to go make some tea.